It’s a God Thing!

by Mary Southerland | | 8 comments

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Faith is the quiet certainty that God keeps His promises. If you are like me, you don’t like to wait on God with “quiet certainty.” We see a need, and instead of seeking God’s wisdom and timing, we make a plan we think will meet that need and then, with earthly resources, make sure the plan is executed. As a result, we often settle for so much less than God had in mind.

Now glory be to God! By His mighty power at work within us, He is able to accomplish infinitely more than we would ever dare to ask or hope (Ephesians 3:20, NLT).

Many children seem to possess the “quiet certainty” that God is able. The prayer life

Speak Life

by Mary Southerland | | 3 comments

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Fruit is one of my favorite foods. When I go grocery shopping, it always takes me longer to get through the fruit section than any other area of the store. I spend what some might consider a ridiculously long time picking out what I hope will be the juiciest apples, the plumpest grapes and the sweetest bananas. Experience has taught me to quickly discard any piece of fruit that is bruised, mushy or discolored. I shake cantaloupe and thump watermelons. Ripe strawberries have a unique sweet scent and only the reddest cherries will do. Plums and tomatoes must be firm to the touch, bright in color and wrinkle-free while the more wrinkles the better when it comes to choosing

A Childlike Heart

by Mary Southerland | | 5 comments

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I recently read the story of a young family who went out to eat at a local restaurant. They were the only family with children eating. The mom sat their little boy, Erik, in a high chair and noticed everyone was quietly sitting and talking. Suddenly, Erik squealed with glee and said, “Hi!” He pounded his fat baby hands on the high chair tray. His eyes were crinkled in laughter and his mouth was bared in a toothless grin as he wriggled and giggled with joy.

The mother looked around and saw the source of his merriment. It was a man wearing baggy pants and shoes so worn that his toes poked out. His shirt was dirty and his

What to Do When Life Stinks

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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I love being a grandmother and work hard at finding any excuse to spend time with our grandchildren. I am convinced they keep me young. I also know they are some of my greatest teachers.

Several years ago, I visited our son and daughter-in-law in Charlotte, North Carolina because four of our six grandchildren live with them. Two of the four are twins. As you can imagine, life is anything but dull as Jered and Jodi try to keep up four children – especially the twins. Lelia, a vivacious little bundle of energy with bouncy blonde curls, blue eyes, and a killer smile, and her twin brother, Jaydan, whose blue eyes and dimples could charm the warts right off

True Love

by Mary Southerland | | 5 comments

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A group of four-through eight-year-olds was asked: “What does love mean?” Their answers vary from the amusing to the profound.

Love is when a girl puts on perfume and a boy puts on shaving cologne, and they go out and smell each other.

Love is when you go out to eat and give somebody most of your French fries without making them give you any of theirs.

Love is what’s in the room with you at Christmas if you stop opening presents and listen.

When you love somebody, your eyelashes go up and down and little stars come out of you.

Love is what makes you smile when you’re tired.

When my grandmother got arthritis, she couldn’t bend over and paint her toenails anymore.

The Spiritual Fixer-Upper

by Mary Southerland | | 6 comments

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I promised myself that I would never buy a house that was a “fixer-upper.” I don’t like fixing things. I want everything to be fixed before I move in. But there I was – buying a town house that needed so much work even the realtor couldn’t believe my husband and I wanted to buy it. Why didn’t someone stop me? No one did, so the sale was made and we went to work. Actually, my son and husband went to work while I went crazy.

I had no idea how horrible the process of remodeling could be. Layer after layer of dirt, grime, stains and ugliness was stripped away. Rotten kitchen cabinets were torn from the walls and

A Lion, A Sheep and a Lesson on Fear

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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For much of my life, I have battled fear. After surrendering my life to Christ, I assumed that I would no longer have to deal with fear. I soon realized that was not the case. I was confused. If God’s presence drives out fear, I must be doing something wrong.

The story is told of a little girl who developed the bad habit of lying. When her birthday came, she received a Saint Bernard puppy but told all of her friends she’d been given a lion. When her mother heard this story, she was not happy. “I told you not to lie. Honesty is very important. Now go upstairs and tell God you’re sorry. Promise Him you’ll never lie

A Lesson Learned on Monkey Bars

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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One of our grandchildren is seven years old and desperately wants to learn how to maneuver Monkey Bars. “Mimi, will you take me to the park so I can practice?” Justus asked. “Absolutely, honey! Let’s do this!” I responded. I remembered how hard I worked to become the fastest girl on Monkey Bars when I was in first grade. I was certain I could help Justus, so off we went!

When we got to the playground, not another person was there. Perfect! I looked at Justus and said, “Show me what you have learned so far.” Justus grinned and started toward the bars. He then stopped and said, “I have only tried once, Mimi. You have a lot of

No Goals – No Gold Part 1

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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I am always amazed by how much training Olympic athletes are willing to invest in order to win a medal. If Christians were willing to make the same kind of investment in running the race of life, I believe the world would be a vastly different place. How important you consider a race to be influences how hard you will run it, and determines the goals you set in order to win that race.

I believe every follower of Christ should have clear life goals based on clear spiritual truths. Many Christians are floundering because they have no spiritual goals. If you want your relationship with God to be motivating, it has to be making progress, accomplishing something, and

No Goals – No Gold Part 2

by Mary Southerland | | 6 comments

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Watching our daughter introduce solid foods to our six-month-old grandson was an intriguing process to witness. I’m not sure if it was the texture or taste that surprised Justus, but the faces he made when that new food was first placed in his little mouth were hilarious. When he liked the new food, his eyes got big; he grinned and made a big smacking sound as if to say, “Where have you been keeping this stuff?” However, a few foods elicited a very different reaction. He scrunched up his face, turned his head and promptly spat out the offending food. Danna quickly learned the art of mixing foods in a single bite and also learned the same food

The Bam-Bam Game

by Mary Southerland | | 5 comments

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Dan and I have one favorite restaurant where we like to eat on our weekly date night. The food is delicious, the atmosphere is quiet, and the waitress makes us feel like we are the most important people on the planet. It is a great place to relax, catch up and make plans for the future. We go to this restaurant for us. It’s our spot.

Our grandchildren have a different spot where they love to go. It is definitely not quiet; the food is geared more to the taste of children, and finding someone who works there is often what I consider a modern day miracle. Yep … you are way ahead of me. It is Chuck E.

Looking for Love in All the Wrong Places

by Mary Southerland | | 3 comments

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In the early days of the automobile, a man’s Model – T Ford stalled in the middle of the road. No matter what he tried, he couldn’t get it started. A chauffeured limousine pulled up behind the stalled car and a wiry, energetic man stepped from the back seat to offer his assistance.

After tinkering with the engine for a few moments, the stranger said, “Now try it!” Immediately, the engine leaped to life. The well-dressed man then identified himself as Henry Ford. “I designed and built these cars,” he said, “So I know what to do when something goes wrong.”

When our lives are broken, when the plan falls apart and everything goes wrong, we need to wait on

Giving the Perfect Christmas Gifts Part 1

by Mary Southerland | | 3 comments

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The world would like us to believe that the success of Christmas depends upon how much we spend, how many presents we give, or how many presents we receive. Christmas is about giving, but price tags do not determine the success of our giving. Giving is not dependent on the condition of our checkbook. Giving is dependent on the condition of our heart. I am so glad! Like you, we have to plan carefully what we buy and how much we spend on each gift. As a result, we have discovered some creative ways to give gifts from the heart, meaningful gifts that cost very little.

A homemade gift

In 1 Corinthians 4:12 Paul teaches that we should “work hard

The Wonder of You

by Mary Southerland | | 3 comments

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As a high school junior, I decided it was time to take Homemaking 101. I can still see Mrs. Johnson’s face as she naively gazed at her new students. Bless her unsuspecting heart! She had no idea the challenge I brought to that class or to her career as a teacher. For weeks, I muddled through each lesson with a respectable, but less than stellar performance, until we hit the section on sewing. It would prove to be her undoing where I was concerned.

Being the veteran teacher that she was, Mrs. Johnson took a deep breath and doggedly plunged ahead in determination, vowing she could teach anyone to sew – even me. I decided to make a

Giving the Perfect Christmas Gifts Part 2

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Have you discovered the truth that we simply cannot “out-give” God? The more we give, the more we receive. And that truth does not just apply to financial giving. It is really all about the attitude behind the gift. Do you remember the Christmas gifts you received last year? How about the Christmas gifts you gave? What about the gift you gave Jesus? Yesterday we talked about several meaningful gifts you can give. Here are a few more for you to consider.

A gift of care   Galatians 6:2 (RSV) “Bear one another’s burdens.”

Christmas is a time of empty hopes and fierce loneliness for many people. In fact, the holidays can be nothing more than a season riddled with pain.

A Longing for Home

by Mary Southerland | | 3 comments

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It was Christmas Eve and the family was preparing to attend the church service. Everyone was going, everyone except Dad. He was an honest man, a good man, but he simply could neither understand nor accept the seemingly complex story of the baby in a manger born to save the world. It was just too far- fetched for the human mind to conceive.

How could God allow His Son to give up Heaven for Earth?

Why would Jesus want to die for any man?

The questions lingered and, not wanting to be a hypocrite, the man chose to stay home rather than sit in a church pew one time a year with an unbelieving heart.

As his family went out into the

The Real Me is Here

by Mary Southerland | | 3 comments

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Our seven-year-old grandson was very sick and in the hospital for seven days. Justus had both a bacterial infection as well as a serious viral infection. His fever spiked to 106 every night for five days and for three of those nights he was listed code red as his heart rate increased and his oxygen levels decreased.

The doctors from Infectious Disease scrambled to figure out which bacteria were causing Justus’ illness. Finally, after four days of all questions and no answers, they switched antibiotics and Justus finally began to improve. We all cheered when his fever only reached 102! And I took my first breath since the moment he got sick.

Our daughter and son-in-law stayed with Justus day

De-Stressing the Holidays

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While I am not a big fan of television, I do enjoy watching a few select home improvement shows. Chip and Joanna Gaines are my two new best friends, and the Property Brothers simply rock! A new fixer-upper show caught my eye, so I checked it out. An interior decorator and homeowner were discussing a list of changes that needed to be made in order to update the home.

“First, we have to do something about those windows,” the decorator announced. I was surprised she listed this task first – until I saw the house. The existing glass was thick and chunky and an ugly shade of something in the neighborhood of mustard. The windows let in no light

Will You Please Give It a Rest?

by Mary Southerland | | 9 comments

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We once had an Australian cattle dog named Dallas. Australian cattle dogs are extremely loyal to a master of their choice. Dallas chose our son Jered to be his master. When Jered came home from school each day, Dallas would greet him at the door and follow him wherever he went. If Jered did homework in his room, Dallas curled under the desk. When Jered ran an errand, Dallas rode shotgun. Dallas instinctively knew that the only place he would find genuine rest was at the feet of his master. The same is true in our lives. But … I am not very good at this rest thing.

Life is so daily and often filled with uncertainty, a reality

Attitude Check

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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On a recent flight, I was thumbing through a magazine someone left behind when the title of an article caught my eye. “Image is everything” the author declared. For a few seconds, I found myself actually agreeing with the author’s statement.

And then the Holy Spirit whispered, “Attitude check!” I knew what that meant. I needed to straighten up and pay attention because something was wrong. And then I saw it – the subtle lie expertly hidden in the seemingly benign words. It was from the pit and smelled like smoke!

As followers of Christ, we sometimes focus on developing and presenting the right image while neglecting the spiritual discipline of integrity. What we wear, how we look, the people

We Win … So Give Thanks!

by Mary Southerland | | 11 comments

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In homes across America, friends and family will soon gather around beautifully decorated tables filled with warm, scrumptious food to give thanks. It’s Thanksgiving Day. However, this day will be nothing like holidays of the past for many people.

Lonely but committed soldiers covered in the dust of battle will patrol foreign borders, fighting for our freedom while their families back home long for word of their safety. The homeless will make their way to the nearest soup kitchen, hoping for a warm meal and a smiling face as so many celebrate this day of abundance. An empty place at the table will be a painful reminder of the loved one lost. A worried husband and dad will sit

Remember the Ninevites!

by Mary Southerland | | 1 comment

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We will never experience the life God wants us to live until we are ready to honestly face and deal with our sin. I mean the kind of honesty that shines a spotlight in every dark corner of our hearts. Getting real. Getting honest. Going all in with God – like the people of Nineveh did.

God sent Jonah to Nineveh with a message – and it was a doozy! Jonah told the Ninevites they had 40 days to clean up their act and get their lives in order, or God would destroy their city.

When the King of Nineveh heard Jonah’s message, he took it seriously. The King first addressed the sin in his own heart. He then vacated

Choose Forgiveness and Set Yourself Free

by Mary Southerland | | 1 comment

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Do you remember the last words of Jesus as He hung on the cross? “It is finished!” The most literal translation would be “paid in full.”

I will never forget paying off my very first car loan. After sending in my forty-eighth and final payment, I celebrated the fact that I finally owned my bright blue and ever-so-compact Chevrolet Vega – from bumper to bumper. There were those who said you couldn’t drive a Vega – you had to wear it. Others described the bright color as strangely “unique.” But to me, it was the most beautiful car in the world because it was mine.

I quickly found other places to spend the once allocated car payment and went on

Learning to Give Joy Away Part 2

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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I once heard a story that offers a great prescription for joy. A young believer came to a man who had followed Christ for many years with the complaint that he had lost his joy. The older and wiser Christian responded, “Go do something for someone else. Repeat that act of kindness nine times. Then you will find joy.”

When we develop the habit of looking for a need and then meeting that need, we will experience joy as never before. Many times, instead of looking for a need, we look the other way.

One of the most amazing paradoxes in the Christian life is that the more we give, the more we receive. We simply cannot out-give God!

In Luke

Be a Joy-Giver Part 1

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We all want to live a joy-filled life – right? But it seems that everyone has their own definition of joy and their own plan for how to experience joy.

A pastor told the story of a lesson he learned when he casually wished one of his older church members a good day. The man remarked, “They’re all good days, Pastor. It’s what we put in them that determines the amount of joy we experience.”

Joy is the deeply rooted confidence that God is in control. When our life is under the control of God, priorities fall into place, life is simpler, and we can experience true joy.

Proverbs 10:28 tells us, “The prospect of the righteous is joy.” In this

Little Can Become Much

by Mary Southerland | | 2 comments

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The feeding of the 5,000 is one of my favorite Bible stories. Aside from the resurrection, it is the only miracle recorded in all four Gospels … and what a miracle it was!

Jesus borrowed a little boy’s lunch. Feeding 5,000 people with just five loaves and two fish was extraordinary in itself, but the Greek word used in Matthew 14:21 refers to males. The women and children present were not included in that number. Many Bible scholars believe the actual number fed that day could have been between 15,000 and 20,000 people. Absolutely amazing!

The setting for this miracle is important. Jesus and the disciples had been ministering to the crowds all day. It was getting late, and they

God’s Got You

by Mary Southerland | | 8 comments

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Tears streamed down my face as I held our seven-year-old grandson, watching him sleep. “Mimi, please lay down with me. Let’s snuggle. I’m so cold,” he asked. I would do anything for this child. He has my heart.

The beeping machines recorded his heart rate, oxygen level … and other vital statistics that simply underscored how sick Justus was. His temperature had risen to 106 but now hovered around 104. The lymph glands in his neck continued to swell to the point that he could not turn his head or open his mouth. Test results confirmed the fact that he had a bacterial infection and a viral infection.

I heard him scream as they tried to draw blood. I held

From a Nobody to a Somebody

by Mary Southerland | | 3 comments

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Have you ever wondered if God even knows your name? Have you doubted His concern about what you are going through? Have you felt totally alone and worthless? I have. I can really relate to the woman described in Luke 13. Oh, our problems may not be exactly the same, but the feelings and emotions are – and so is the answer.

Jesus knew this woman. He knew she had been sick for 18 long years and that she had tried everything to be healed. He knew – but He looked past her pain and saw who she really was. He could have called her by name, but instead He said, “Woman.” Jesus included her whole identity in that

Going Around the Same Old Mountain

by Mary Southerland | | 3 comments

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There is only one thing more painful than learning from experience – and that is not learning from experience. Life is a journey, not a destination. It is through that journey that we are born, broken, changed and shaped.

Life is God’s chosen classroom in which He teaches His children how to love and live out His truth. One of the first and most vital truths we need to learn in our walk with God is obedience.

Truth does not change. We must change in response to the truth. A learned truth is an applied truth, and when we apply truth, we are practicing obedience. When we don’t learn from our wrong choices, we are doomed to make the same

A Touch of Compassion

by Mary Southerland | | 1 comment

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It was Easter Sunday, and I was sitting in the sanctuary waiting for the worship service to begin. Anticipating a large crowd, I arrived early to drop Jered off in the nursery, one of his favorite places to go since every nursery worker doted on him. As the choir filed in, a friend slipped into the pew beside me and said, “I think you need to go to the nursery. Something is wrong with Jered.” Jumping up, I leapt over legs, toes, and pews as I raced to the church nursery and my son.

When I got to the nursery, I was not prepared for what I saw. In a far corner, lying on his favorite red mat was

My Safe Place

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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Job was an extraordinary man, husband, father, and leader who served God faithfully. His faithfulness to God in prosperity was a powerful testimony, but His faithfulness to God in the face of death, pain, and despair was even more powerful.

Did Job doubt and question God?

Absolutely!

Did Job openly and honestly grieve his loss and weep in his pain?

Yes!

But Job remained faithful to God, even when he did not understand why God would let him endure such suffering.

Job stood firm in his faith even when his heart and body was broken. God was pleased with Job and rewarded him for his faithfulness.

The LORD blessed the latter part of Job’s life more than the first (Job 42:11).

You are no stranger to

But I Don’t Feel Like Praising God

by Mary Southerland | | 1 comment

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I once saw a refrigerator magnet that said, “I know God promises to never give me more than I can handle, but sometimes, I just wish He didn’t trust me so much.” Can you relate?

When trials come and life seems hard, we plead with God to deliver us from the problem when many times His plan is to deliver us in the problem.

Praise does not depend on an understanding of the circumstance or trial. Praise depends on an understanding of who God really is and wants to be in our life, and on our willingness to put our faith in Him.

As humans, we will never fully understand God – this side of heaven. God is holy and without

Under the Protection of The Most High

by Mary Southerland | | 3 comments

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Corrie Ten Boom tells the true story of young Englishman who was held prisoner in a German prion camp for a long period of time during World War II. One day he read Psalm 91 and fell to his knees in prayer.

“Father in heaven,” he prayed. “I see all these men dying around me, one after the other. Will I also have to die here? I am still young and I very much want to work in Your kingdom here on earth.”

God spoke to his heart, “Rely on what you have just read and go home.”

Trusting God, the young Englishman got up and walked into the corridor toward the gate.

A guard called out, “Prisoner, where are you going?”

“I

The Lonely Antelope

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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Dan and I have traveled to many foreign countries on mission trips. Our family vacations have taken us across the United States … but we had never been to Yellowstone National Park and had only driven through Montana on our way to another state. So when I booked a speaking engagement in Gardner, Montana, we decided to take a few days following the event for a mini-vacation.

It did not take us long to fall in love with Montana. We flew into Billings and made our way to Gardner where we had booked a hotel. The drive was spectacular. The hotel was rustic and quaint, and the people could not have been nicer.

But Yellowstone National Park was unlike anything

Blessings In the Pool

by Mary Southerland | | 6 comments

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It all started with a swimsuit. I had to buy one. Dan and I were joining our kids and grandkids for a week of family vacation in Charleston, South Carolina. The beach, a swimming pool, and water parks were on the agenda, and I wanted to do them all!

Ladies, I know you can understand my feelings of terror at the thought of having to find a swimsuit that actually fits and looks good on me. I had two days before we left, and both of those days were crammed full – appointments, meetings, and writing deadlines stared me in the face.

I prayed. Yes. I. Did. I asked God to help me find the right swimsuit. It had to

The Gift of Prayer

by Mary Southerland | | 2 comments

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Praying for the people we love is one of the greatest gifts we can give them. And letting those people know we are praying for them is an important part of that gift. I was recently reminded that this truth applies to children as well.

Two of our grandchildren live in Kansas City, so we get to seem them every few days. My husband and I love it and are always looking for opportunities to spend time with them.

We invited Justus and Hudson over to meet our new worship pastor and his wife who have a set of triplets and a little boy about the age of Hudson. We turned all of the kids loose in our fenced-in back

A New Faith Adventure

by Mary Southerland | | 5 comments

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Pain and crisis are familiar companions in my life. A close friend recently told me our family should do a reality television show because no one would believe what we deal with on a daily basis.

Can you relate?

The reality is that we live in a broken world. Trials and trouble are a byproduct of that broken world. I have repeatedly pleaded with God for an exemption clause, but there doesn’t seem to be one – this side of Heaven. However, I have discovered an amazing truth that makes it easier to face every shattering moment that lies ahead.

Isaiah 45:3 I will give you hidden treasures, riches stored in secret places, so that you may know that I am

The Miracle is On Its Way

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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Christmas morning is serious business at the Southerland home. The sequence of events does not vary. First come the stockings. Everyone has a bulging stocking spilling over with small gifts.

And I am not talking about just any old stocking stuffers. I listen and question and watch our children and grandchildren all year long to see what makes their eyes sparkle and their faces light up.

I keep an ever-evolving Christmas list. No one knows where I keep it. And no one ever will if I can help it. I begin buying stocking stuffers and gifts each summer, and I stash them in secret hiding places around the house. I told you … serious business!

After the stockings are opened, we

Oh, How He Loves

by Mary Southerland | | 3 comments

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Grandchildren often remind me how to find joy in the simple things of life. When our twin grandchildren were about two years old, I took them on a little shopping trip. When Mimi comes for a visit, there is always a shopping trip on the agenda. Lelia and Jaydan piled into the car, and we headed to the store. I think I was more excited than they were. That’s how grandmothers are.

Once inside the store, we grabbed a shopping cart, and off we went in search of treasures. In other words, we needed toys!

As we headed to the toy section of the store, we passed the pharmacy – which reminded me that I needed to pick up some vitamins.

The Mustard Seed of Faith

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I am not a quitter! What some might call stubbornness, I prefer to call perseverance – especially when it comes to growing flowers and plants.

We recently downsized and moved to a house with a small wooden deck in the back yard. I took one look at that deck and could almost hear it crying out for beautiful plants spilling over the edges of brightly colored ceramic planters. My stubbornness … uh, perseverance … kicked in, and I thought, “I can do this!”

I headed to the local nursery where they know me. And by “know me” I mean they understand that I can kill just about any living plant known to mankind.

Linda greeted me with a smile. Linda and

Let Go and Trust God

by Mary Southerland | | 6 comments

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Babies fascinate me. They are so fresh from God. And have so much to learn! Think about it. Babies come into this world knowing nothing. For starters, they have to learn how to roll over, how to sit up, and eventually the biggie – learning to walk.

I had forgotten just how amazing the process of learning to walk really is until our grandson Justus reminded me. Justus was a speed crawler who could scoot along the floor almost as fast as I could walk. For the first 12 months of his life, Justus seemed content to explore the bottoms of tables and chairs, play with doorstops or inspect food crumbs on the floor.

But the day came when he

Hard to Help

by Mary Southerland | | 7 comments

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I was behind … tired … and stressed out. I had too many irons in the fire and too many writing deadlines staring me in the face. So when my husband Dan asked if he could do anything to help, I said, “Sure! You can write one of the Girlfriends in God devotions I need to turn in tomorrow.” I didn’t really think he would do it. But he did. And God used it to smack me right between the eyes. I just had to share it with you!

There are so things I absolutely adore about my wife of forty years. She is my best friend, the best mom I have ever known, and the walking definition of

Learn How to Sit Down

by Mary Southerland | | 1 comment

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I had a list of things to get done. Yes, my back was killing me. I was tired, but that list kept me hurrying around the house like the proverbial Energizer Bunny. When my husband walked in from work, I gave him a quick hug and resumed my almost frantic pace.

“What are you doing, honey?” Dan asked. With one of my famous sighs, I responded, “I just need to get a few things done.” “How is your back?” Dan persisted. With growing irritation, I answered, “It hurts!” Dan watched me for a few minutes and then calmly stated, “You don’t know how to sit down, do you?” My first response was irritation, which quickly escalated into anger –

The Art of Listening

by Mary Southerland | | 3 comments

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I graduated from college with a degree in elementary education. For the first two years of college, I took the basic courses in Math, English, History, and Science required for all degrees. I then began taking courses that I assumed would prepare me to teach elementary school. During my last year of school, I reached the required Student Teaching block.

The Student Teaching block was spent in an actual elementary classroom under the supervision of an experienced teacher. Mrs. Roberta McShan was my supervising teacher and a magician in the classroom. She taught third grade and soon became my role model as a teacher. I learned more about teaching in that one semester than I had learned in all

Let’s Be Encouragers!

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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I recently read about an African tribe that has what we might consider an unusual approach for dealing with people who make mistakes. When a member of this tribe does something wrong, they take the person to the center of the village where the tribe surrounds him. For two days, they remind him of the good things he has done. The tribe believes that mistakes are often a cry for help, and hope to provide that help through the layers of encouragement they freely give.

Dan began making wooden furniture when we lived in South Florida. My job was to stain and finish the pieces after he had completed them. I had never worked with wood or stain and

A Plan for Anger Management Part 2

by Mary Southerland | | 1 comment

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The people around us want to see what happens when life pushes our buttons and anger puts the squeeze on our emotions. While God created us with the capacity for strong emotions, it is our responsibility to control them instead of allowing them to control us. Yesterday, we looked at four ways to manage anger. Here are four more:

Be focused.  

Psalm 37:8 “Refrain from anger and turn from wrath.”

I have witnessed the utter strength and beauty of our daughter and daughter-in-law as they gave birth to our beautiful grandchildren. The pain was excruciating, but both worked through each contraction by doing two things: controlling their breathing and choosing a focus point. We need to do the same when

A Plan for Anger Management Part 1

by Mary Southerland | | 2 comments

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We live in a very angry world. Road rage … suicide bombings … random shootings … bullies terrorize their victims online and in schools … acts of violence fill the news every day. The reality is that everyone has to deal with anger. The challenge is to deal with anger in the right way. Anger is powerful – an emotional warning that something is wrong. We have been hurt or rejected. Something has changed, and we don’t like it!

Anger itself is not sin. We just have to learn to express anger in the right way. Mishandled anger is destructive, but anger that is handled correctly can become a tool for good. God’s Word is filled with tips for

Making God Smile

by Mary Southerland | | 1 comment

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I have several roles in life. I am a wife, a mother, an author, a speaker … the list is really quite impressive. But being Mimi to our six grandchildren hovers around the top of that list. So when the phone rang, and I heard the sweet voice of our grandson Justus ask, “Mimi, can you and Papa come to my school for Grandparent’s Day?” I did not even have to look at my calendar. Whatever appointments I might have had could be moved in a heartbeat. “We would love to, buddy!” I replied.

When Dan and I arrived, Justus’ teacher, Mrs. Fox, greeted us and told us to look around. Since I taught elementary school for several years

Mission Impossible

by Mary Southerland | | no comments

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Most people recognize the familiar line from every Mission Impossible movie,  “Your mission…  should you choose to accept it …”

God asks us the same question. We have a God-given mission. We are called by God to be a blessing in the world where we live, work, and play. But we choose to accept or reject that mission every single day.

Sometimes the call of God seems to make no sense … almost ridiculous. Gideon felt that way when God called him.

Gideon was a farmer, a family man just trying to earn a living and put food on the table. He felt inadequate to carry out God’s plan for his life.

But God saw what Gideon could be … not just

The Picture of Repentance

by Mary Southerland | | 1 comment

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It had been a rough afternoon for Hudson, our four-year-old grandson. Dan and I were keeping him and his brother Justus for a few days while our daughter and son-in-law were out of town. I know. It’s a rough job, but somebody has to do it.

I had spent a week getting ready for their visit. The checklist was complete!

The refrigerator, pantry, and snack drawer were filled with their favorite foods.

The toys were assembled and ready for action.

The bed in our guestroom was piled high with extra pillows, blankets, and stuffed animals waiting to be hugged.

Favorite books were stacked beside their bed for naps and bedtime imaginations.

Now all we needed were the boys! When we went to pick them

Whose Voice Do You Hear?

by Mary Southerland | | 1 comment

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I taught third grade for several years while my husband Dan attended Southwestern Seminary in Fort Worth, Texas. I was fortunate to be assigned to one of the largest and best elementary schools in town. My class was one of seven third-grade classes.

Anyone who has ever taught school knows that the first few days of school are always chaotic.

The PE teacher was a welcome sight when she appeared at my door to take the students out to the playground. After PE it was the responsibility of each teacher to pick up her students. Seven teachers trying to get the attention of over 200 students was especially interesting on the first or second day of school when the teachers

When God Turns Tragedy Into Triumph

by Mary Southerland | | 10 comments

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I will never forget the day I learned how God really can turn tragedy into triumph. I was sitting at my desk, working on an assignment from the counselor I had been seeing. For months I had been wrestling with my past – slowly, methodically working through painful issues and buried memories that seemed to be feeding the clinical depression I was battling. As page after page filled with harsh realities, a memory slammed into my heart and mind.

I grew up in a small Texas town where we lived in what some would call a “shack” on the edge of town. My mother worked three jobs to support three children, but her main job was as a nurse.

I

Where Would I Be Without My Mountains?

by Mary Southerland | | 2 comments

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Dan and I have been all over the United States and the world … but we had never been to Montana. So when I booked a speaking engagement there, we decided to take a few days following the event for a mini-vacation.

We fell in love with Montana! The event was amazing! The leadership, preparation, and prayer that had gone into the planning of the conference blessed me in a huge way. I knew before the doors opened that God was all over it. And I was so right! God’s presence was powerful as 12 women surrendered their lives to Him and dozens of others made fresh commitments that would forever change their lives! So I was already flying

Natural Prayer

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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Three ministers were talking about prayer and the most effective positions for prayer. As they were talking, a telephone repairman worked silently in the background.

One minister shared that he felt the key to powerful prayer was in the hands. “I always hold my hands together and point them upward as a sign of worship,” he explained.

The second minister suggested that real prayer should always be conducted on the knees.

The third minister shook his head and said, “I’m afraid you both have it wrong. The only position worth its salt is to pray while stretched out flat on your face.”

As the three ministers solemnly contemplated the wisdom they had shared, the phone man put down his tools, approached the

It’s All About Timing

by Mary Southerland | | 8 comments

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My husband was determined to teach me how to fish … whether I wanted to learn or not. We were on vacation with our two children and everyone was getting in on Dan’s fishing lessons.

Danna had already announced that she would never – under any circumstances – touch a worm or a fish. Dan and Jered promised to bait her hook and reel in any fish she caught. I knew what they were thinking: the possibility of Danna actually learning how to cast a line or catch a fish was so remote that they had nothing to fear. They could not have been more wrong.

The fish seemed to jump on Danna’s hook. She squealed with excitement as she

How’s Your Heart? Part 1

by Mary Southerland | | 10 comments

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It had been a very long day. My husband and I were both tired and looking forward to a good night’s sleep – but we needed to talk. We didn’t have any major concerns or problems to discuss; we just wanted to catch up on life and unwind a little bit.

Dan was telling me about his day when he suddenly stopped, looked around and asked, “What was that beeping sound?” I hadn’t heard anything but suggested that the smoke detector battery probably needed replacing.

“It was a different kind of beeping,” Dan insisted. We listened – nothing. We turned out the lights and went to sleep, and I forgot all about the elusive beeping.

When Dan came home from work

How’s Your Heart Part 2

by Mary Southerland | | 9 comments

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I was physically exhausted and had let my guard down. The minute I let my guard down, the enemy moved in with a vengeance. My unguarded heart was in trouble, wounded by the words of someone I love.

I knew what I needed to do – deal with the hurt, forgive the one who had hurt me, and let go of the pain. I just didn’t want to do it. And God calls that sin.

If you did not read yesterday’s devotion about my husband’s defibrillator, I encourage you to take a few minutes to do that now.

As surely as that beeping defibrillator grabbed Dan’s attention, the Holy Spirit grabbed mine. I examined my life for ways to guard my

Choose Humility Over Pride

by Mary Southerland | | 2 comments

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We live in a broken world where bad things happen. While we cannot always control the things that happen to us or to those around us, we can control how we respond to painful circumstances. If we want to handle hurt in a way that pleases God, we have to make the right choices.

One of the most important choices we must make is to choose humility over pride. And that is a tough one. You may be wondering what humility could possibly have to do with learning how to handle hurt. We cannot handle hurt until we are willing to admit that we are hurting. Why is that so hard to do? I believe it is because of our pride. We should be able

What Will You Do With Your Pain?

by Mary Southerland | | 9 comments

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I love a great movie! To me, a movie is great when good wins over evil, the right guy gets the right girl, nobody gets hurt and everyone lives happily ever after. A bit naive, I know. But I have decided that there is enough harsh reality ripping through daily life without paying to see more on a movie screen.

With these criteria in mind, I went to see the movie “Sea Biscuit.” There I was; popcorn in hand, minding my own business and enjoying my brief respite, when his words slammed into my soul, yanking me back to the tenacious essence and interminable power of truth.

“You don’t throw a whole life away just because it’s banged up a little.”

I was

Choose Peace Over Worry

by Mary Southerland | | 7 comments

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My husband often says there are two kinds of people in the world. Some people have ulcers, and some people give them. Can you relate? I certainly can.

Sandpaper people are definitely ulcer giving people unless we learn to choose peace over worry when dealing with them. Getting along with people who rub you the wrong way is difficult at best and can sometimes make peace seem impossible to find. That is only true if peace is dependent on outer circumstances.

It isn’t.

Peace is an inside job and comes only from God. Nothing can take the place of peace, and it is impossible to counterfeit.

Sandpaper people are not peaceful people. One of the very reasons they are rough around the

Believing God in the Hard Times

by Mary Southerland | | 20 comments

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A mess is the perfect setting for a miracle. Our helplessness can be our most powerful offering – if we are willing to be honest and transparent. Sometimes it is a lot easier to just stay in the darkness than it is to struggle toward the light.

Not everyone really wants to be healed or rescued. Why?

Because their infirmity has become their identity or because their crisis now defines who they are and forms the familiar parameters of their life. Some people use their weaknesses to get the attention they crave or to keep from assuming any responsibility in their own lives.

Take the man at the pool of Bethesda for example.

The pool of Bethesda was the gathering place for

Speak Life

by Mary Southerland | | 3 comments

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I recently received an email from a friend who told me the story of a private school in Washington that faced an unusual problem. Some of 12-year-old girls were beginning to use lipstick and would gather around the mirrors in the bathroom to compare shades and apply their lipstick.

The girls thought it was cute to then press their lips to the bathroom mirrors, leaving dozens of lip prints. The maintenance man did not think it was cute because he had to clean the mirrors – and you know how icky lipstick on a mirror can be.

Every night the maintenance man would remove the lipstick prints only to find that the girls put them back the next day.

The principal

How to Find Your Missing Peace

by Mary Southerland | | 8 comments

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I love the story of the little girl who was working very hard on her homework one night. As the hours went by, her parents became very curious and asked her what she was doing. “I’m writing a report on the condition of the world and how to bring peace,” she replied. Her parents were impressed! “Isn’t that a big assignment for just one person?” her dad asked. With complete confidence the little girl responded, “Don’t worry, Dad. There are three of us in the class working on it.” Wouldn’t it be wonderful if finding and experiencing peace was that easy?

We work hard at peace – in our world, in our homes, in our relationships, and in our

Tired? Don’t Quit!

by Mary Southerland | | 11 comments

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The story is told of a great pianist who was scheduled to perform for a small country town. Everyone was excited since they rarely had the opportunity to hear a famous musician. A young mother was especially excited. Her son had been taking piano lessons and showed great promise … but he hated to practice. His mother was hoping that if her son saw the great pianist perform, he would be motivated to take his music more seriously.

The night of the concert finally arrived, and it seemed as if everyone in town had come. As the young mother settled her son in his seat, her attention turned to the crowd pouring in. Everyone was dressed in their finest,

Winning Over Worry

by Mary Southerland | | 2 comments

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When we lived in South Florida, the grass in our yard grew year round. So did the weeds. We soon learned that the best way to deal with weeds was simply to take really good care of the grass. When the grass was healthy, it was thick and lush – leaving little room for weeds to grow.

When our hearts and lives are filled with praise, worry is a weed that will die from lack of attention. When we choose to continually give God thanks, there will be little room in our hearts for fear.

Why?

Because praise acknowledges the very character of God, while thanksgiving recognizes the work of His hand. Together, praise and thanksgiving are powerful weapons against worry

Making the Choice to Forgive

by Mary Southerland | | no comments

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A little boy went to see the Washington Monument in Washington, D.C. When he arrived, he pointed up at the monument and announced to the guard on duty, “I want to buy it.” The guard asked, “How much money do you have?”

The boy reached into his pocket and pulled out a quarter. The guard said, “That is not enough.” The little boy replied, “I thought you would say that” and pulled out nine more cents.

The guard looked down at the small boy and said, “You need to understand three things. First, thirty-four cents is not enough. Second, the Washington Monument has never been, nor will it ever be for sale. Third, if you are an American citizen, then

God’s Got It!

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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I am an avid reader. In fact, reading is one of my favorite ways to escape the chaotic pace of daily life. I also enjoy browsing through bookstores, especially the ones that provide cushy chairs where customers can sit quietly and read without being disturbed.

It is easy to tune out your surroundings and lose yourself in the pages of a good book. I was doing just that when I heard a familiar voice. Looking up, I spotted one of my friends, Carol, who was asking an employee where she could find a new suspense novel that had just been released. The young man quickly handed Carol the book from his personal stash behind the counter and went back

Look for the Pearls

by Mary Southerland | | 5 comments

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Life can be so irritating. It’s usually the little things that annoy me the most. The lost set of keys or the misplaced cell phone. The icemaker that quits working before a party … the little things.

But then there are times when people are the problem. They show up without an invitation or call when I am running out the door, late for an appointment. Been there?

I am convinced that these tiny irritations are a tool in the hand of a loving Father who uses them as “heavenly sandpaper” to rub off our rough edges.

I was invited to speak for a women’s conference based on the theme, “Pearls of Wisdom.” When I arrived at the conference center, every

The Cracked Life Part 1

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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I must be getting older because I have six grandchildren. And they really do say the most hilarious things – sometimes. Other times, their words can absolutely nail me to the wall and put life in perspective in a split second.

A few weeks ago I was keeping our three-year-old grandson Hudson while our daughter took his older brother to the doctor. Hudson has strawberry-blonde hair, blue eyes, a killer smile … and he loves to snuggle. I know. It’s a deadly combination.

After Danna and Justus left, Hudson crawled up in my lap and just grinned at me. Then he began to gently rub my face with his little hand. My heart just melted. He was probably thinking what

The Cracked Life Part 2

by Mary Southerland | | 12 comments

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I have discovered some wonderful advantages to growing older. Honestly, I can get away with so much more than I could when I was younger – and I have to say that I love it!

Like many of you, I have paid some heavy life dues. I am enjoying a refreshing freedom in what I say and do – as long as I say and do it in love and with integrity before God.

I am flat-out amazed by the fact that people value my advice. They actually think I know what I am doing. Hilarious! I know!

But I am thrilled to share the lessons and God-truths I have learned along the way, and I am also free to occasionally

Family Matters

by Mary Southerland | | 2 comments

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I remember that night well. It was so many years ago, but it seems like yesterday. And what a crazy day it had been! Probably a day like many of yours.

I was a young mom with two small children. My husband was the youth pastor of a large church in town. I taught a weekly Bible study for senior high girls and directed a youth choir that practiced one night a week and sang for the early worship service every Sunday. We hosted a youth bible study in our home every Monday night … and, well, you get the idea. My schedule was almost to the point of ridiculous and I was exhausted most of the time. But

For God So Loves Me

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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Shakespeare described jealousy as a “green-eyed monster.” I once heard it called “the gangrene of the soul.” Jealousy is usually thought of as a negative trait we need to guard against. But with God, jealousy takes on a whole new meaning.

God is a jealous God.

The root idea in the Old Testament word jealous is to become intensely red, referring to the way our face changes color with rising emotion when something or someone very dear to us is threatened. Both the Old and New Testament words for jealousy are translated “zeal.”

In other words, being jealous and being zealous is basically the same thing in the Bible. God is zealous – eager about protecting what is precious to Him.

My First Miracle

by Mary Southerland | | 20 comments

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My husband has had heart problems for years. So I know a lot about irregular heartbeats, cardio versions, heart ablations and defibrillators. We assumed his symptoms were heart related – shortness of breath, extreme fatigue, lightheadedness and inability to climb even a few stairs without wheezing. But when all of the usual tests his cardiologist ordered came back normal, a sliver of fear took root in my heart.

We went to our primary care doctor who ordered a whole new battery of tests. The results of those tests said that Dan had ILD. We were stunned.

Lung disease was a game changer. I had never heard of Interstitial Lung Disease … but it did not sound good. And the more

God Sees You

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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I will never forget the first time I took our two-year-old son to the beach. I assumed Jered would take one look at the ocean and make a beeline for the water. We lived in South Florida at the time where many of the people we knew either had a swimming pool or lived on a canal that literally ran through their backyard. Since the tropical climate made it possible for Jered to play outside almost every day of the year, it was not unusual for him to be around water of some kind on a regular basis.

Just to be sure the trip was successful, I did what I thought was a fairly impressive job of preparing Jered

More Than Enough

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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How much is enough? How much money do we have to make to be contented or to feel financially secure? How much “stuff” do we have to own to consider ourselves a success? How much is enough?

I grew up in Texas where we lived in what some might call a “shack” on the edge of a small town. To me, it was just home. My amazing mother often worked three jobs to make ends meet but that “meeting” did not always happen. Looking back, I can honestly say that God always provided what we needed – when we needed it. He still does.

My husband and I knew the finances would be tight one month and had planned accordingly

Come and Rest in Him

by Mary Southerland | | 10 comments

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From the moment of birth, we are taught that successful people never give up. Yet, I have discovered the paradoxical secret that true success can only be found in complete surrender.

Dr. Billy Graham tells the story of a little child who was playing with a very valuable vase. The child put his hand into the vase but could not pull it out. His father tried to free the little boy’s hand, but couldn’t. They were thinking of breaking the vase when the father said, “Son, let’s try one more time. Open your hand and hold your fingers out really straight and then pull.” The look of alarm on the boy’s face surprised the dad until the little boy

The Power of the Pit Part 1

by Mary Southerland | | 9 comments

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Have you ever received a gift that you wanted to return … but couldn’t? I certainly felt that way about the pit of depression the first time I experienced it. First of all, I did not see depression as a gift. Second, I wanted to take that nasty black hole to the nearest “Pit Store” and exchange it for a tall mountain of victory.

But I have finally come to the place where I thank God for what He has done in my life through my struggle with depression. I now realize that anything that makes me cry out to God can be counted as a blessing.

We all have a pit of some kind in our lives. Oh, your

The Power of the Pit Part 2

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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We have several choices about how to deal with the pain and darkness in life. We can become bitter and blame God or someone else for the pain, or we can give up and wallow in the mire and mud of that slimy pit.

At one point in my life, I simply plastered a smile on my face, gritted my teeth, and denied that the pit even existed. Not a good choice.

I eventually learned that the choice I should make when it comes to dealing with depression or any other pit life throws my way is to trust God, knowing He will deliver me.

Trusting God means understanding that He may deliver me from the pit or He may deliver

When His Face is Toward Us

by Mary Southerland | | 5 comments

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Pastor James Moore of Houston, Texas tells the story of a young man whose wife died, leaving him with a small son to raise alone. After a beautiful and moving memorial service, the young man and his son returned home from the cemetery.

Family and friends had all gone home. The man was lost. Numb with grief, he decided he and his son would go to bed early because there was nothing else he could bear to do.

After tucking the little boy into bed, the young father laid in the darkness – heartbroken and weeping – wondering how he could go on without his wife beside him. The voice of his son broke through the darkness with a haunting

You Can Count on the Promises of God

by Mary Southerland | | 3 comments

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I love money-back guarantees. We once bought a car to replace a van that had 125,000 miles on it. Our first vacation in the new car was a disaster. We began having trouble the very first day. On our way home, we stopped in four different cities, trying to find a mechanic who could repair the car. No one could explain or even find the problem. Needless to say, we were not happy campers. But when we returned home and contacted the dealership, we were told that because of the guarantee on the car, we could get our money back or trade it in for another one. Loved it!

Did you know that every promise of God is backed

The Architect of My Life

by Mary Southerland | | 3 comments

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Our son was born to be a builder. From the time he could hold a plastic red hammer in his toddler-sized hands, Jered began hammering imaginary nails into the coffee table, fixing everything that was broken in our house. No wooden surface in our home was safe from Jered’s scrutiny or design.

Since my husband enjoyed woodworking, he decided to build Jered a miniature workbench beside his own. Several nights each week, Dan and Jered headed to the garage to pound and hammer and do what they called “man stuff.” I thought it was cute – a philosophy that would drastically change in the years to come.

When he was in middle school, Jered built a clubhouse inside our garage.

My Bitter – Sweet Life

by Mary Southerland | | 43 comments

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I hate depression. It is an all-too-familiar foe in my life. I know. I am a grounded Christian and have walked with God for many years. I am a pastor’s wife … a Christian author and speaker. According to many people, I shouldn’t struggle with depression, but I do. It keeps me on my face before God. It keeps me broken and desperate for Him.

Thousands – seriously – thousands of people have prayed for me to be delivered and set free from this battle.

I continually search my heart, mind, and soul for some un-confessed sin.

I have sifted through my past and dealt with every painful memory God has brought to mind.

I have tried dozens of nutritional cures and

Not a Fan of Closed Doors?

by Mary Southerland | | 2 comments

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As a grandmother, I can testify to the importance of gates. Shortly after our grandson Hudson’s first birthday, he started to walk. He had been a champion crawler for several months – and he loved stairs. We just happened to live in a townhouse that had three flights of stairs, much to Hudson’s delight. Oh, we bought him toys, but they were nothing more than momentary distractions from his favorite toy – the stairs.

When Hudson first learned to climb up the stairs, we bought a gate to keep him from falling down those same stairs. I wondered how he would react to his new confinement. It didn’t take long to find out. When our daughter dropped him off

Celebrate Your Weaknesses!

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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For many years, I did everything I possibly could to hide or erase any weakness in my life. When that didn’t work, I simply pretended that those weak areas didn’t exist. Why? Because if I was weak, how could Jesus love me? How could anyone love me? How could I love myself?

When our son, Jered, began to walk, I immediately noticed that his feet turned inward. Our pediatrician recommended a specialist who examined Jered thoroughly, then ordered several x-rays. The more he examined Jered, the more concerned we became. When the specialist finally called us in for a consultation, we braced ourselves for bad news … just in case. The doctor’s stoic face revealed nothing, but his diagnosis

Are You in the Right Spot?

by Mary Southerland | | 5 comments

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We all want to be successful in our work. Your office may be downtown or just inside your front door. Your work clothes may be an elegant suit or ragged jeans and a stained t-shirt. You may be paid in cash or with crayon drawings and sticky kisses. It doesn’t really matter because none of these things alone makes us successful in the work place.

Many people never experience success in their work because they are in the wrong work to begin with. Not me. As a high school student, I knew exactly what I wanted to be – a nurse. My mother was a nurse, and I wanted to be just like her. So I signed up to

When I Am Afraid

by Mary Southerland | | 6 comments

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As I was putting our seven-year-old grandson Justus to bed one night, he started talking about fear. “I don’t like to be scared, Mimi. It makes my tummy feel funny and my heart gets kind of jumpy.” I thought that was an excellent description of fear. But knowing Justus and his pure heart that goes hard after God, I should have known he was not through. “But the most awful thing about fear is that I don’t think Jesus likes it, do you, Mimi? I mean, it doesn’t make Him smile, and I want to make Him smile. What do you do when you get scared, Mimi?” I soaked up the wisdom of his words and then whispered

Celebrate the Broken

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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He was a friend … a pastor visiting my husband and me for a few days. He had come for help and advice because his wife was broken – a statement that made me just a tad bit angry for some reason. I didn’t really know why it made me angry, but it did.

“John, what did you mean when you said your wife is broken?” I asked. His eyes filled with tears as he explained, “She has been diagnosed with clinical depression. Mary, you have never met her, but she is the strongest woman I have ever known. She is talented, godly, and beautiful. But six months ago, she broke. It’s like she shattered into a million pieces

I Hear You!

by Mary Southerland | | 2 comments

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Every relationship begins with listening. Listening is hard work and something we are not prone to do. I tend to use listening time as time to prepare the eloquent things I am going to say when the other person stops talking.

President Franklin D. Roosevelt got tired of smiling that big smile he was known for and saying the usual things he said at the White House receptions. One evening he decided to find out if anyone was really listening to what he was saying. As each person came up to him to shake his hand, he flashed his big smile and said, “I murdered my grandmother this morning.” People automatically responded with comments such as “How lovely” or

God Shows Up in a Crisis

by Mary Southerland | | 13 comments

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Have you ever ridden in a helicopter? It’s the ride of a lifetime! But when you land … now that’s another story. A helicopter landing sends absolutely everything flying in a hundred different directions at ridiculously high speeds. I know. That’s how I live life.

One of the reasons I love the apostle Paul is because he seemed to live the same kind of life. Philippians is one of my favorite books written by Paul. The fourth chapter of Philippians is one of the most positive passages Paul ever wrote … and it is written in the midst of a helicopter landing in Paul’s life! Paul is in a Roman jail awaiting judgment and possible execution. He could be

Angels and Prayer

by Mary Southerland | | 2 comments

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From the smallest concern to the biggest problem in our lives, God cares. If it is big enough to concern you, it is big enough to concern Him.

Author, speaker Holocaust survivor Corrie Ten Boom told of a remarkable experience at the horrific Nazi Ravensbruck prison camp.

Together we entered the terrifying building. At a table were women who took away all our possessions. Everyone had to undress completely and then go to a room where her hair was checked.

I asked a woman who was busy checking the new arrivals if I might use the bathroom. She pointed to a door, and I discovered that the convenience was nothing more than a hole in the shower room floor. Betsie stayed

It’s Time To Make Up Your Mind!

by Mary Southerland | | 5 comments

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As I stood on the sideline of the football field where my then eighteen-year-old son was practicing for the South Florida All Star Football Game, I was not prepared for the hideous sounds and horrific sights that assaulted every protective sense I have as a mother. My baby – my six-foot, two hundred and thirty pound baby – was knocking padded giants left and right as he bulldozed his way toward the goal line.

Mixed emotions and foreign thoughts flooded my heart and mind. On one hand, I was so proud of Jered that I felt like shouting to the college scouts standing beside me, “That’s my boy!” On the other hand, I wanted to drag him off the

The Gift of Friendship

by Mary Southerland | | 7 comments

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Friendship is the springboard to every other love and the foundation for every healthy relationship. It is a proven fact that lonely people live shorter lives than those who have healthy friendships. Even Jesus needed friends when He walked this earth as a man. In fact, He placed great value on relationships. The Bible tells us Jesus spent much of His time deepening the relationships with a few – not the crowd.

God created us to need each other. That truth is never more evident than when we are in pain or struggling with some crisis in life. One of the main factors leading to a two-year battle with clinical depression in my life was the absence of replenishing

Time to Get Healthy!

by Mary Southerland | | 5 comments

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I have struggled with weight issues since I was a little girl. Part of my struggle is rooted in “fluffy” genes lovingly passed down to me through several generations of “fluffy” relatives. The remainder of my struggle is firmly rooted in the fact that I hate exercise, take medications that cause weight gain, enjoy eating, and sometimes use food as an emotional outlet and reward.

I was a young adult and living on my own before I realized that part of the creation process included green things called vegetables. The motto in our family was, “If it ain’t fried, it ain’t right.” Gravy was a condiment and potatoes a staple at every meal. No bread? How can you have

Building a Successful Family

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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What a crazy day it had been! It was a day probably like many of yours. I was a young mom with two small children. My husband was the youth pastor at a large church in town. I taught a weekly Bible study for senior high girls and directed a youth choir that practiced one night a week and sang for the early worship service every Sunday. We hosted a youth Bible study in our home every Monday night … and, well, you get the idea. My schedule was almost to the point of ridiculous, and I was exhausted most of the time. But this particular day had been crazier than most.

Both kids had a cold and were

The Beatitudes of a Great Mom

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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We live in a world that often denies the importance of being a mom. I am certainly not an expert. When our daughter was born, the bottom line of my heart was simply to be a successful mom. Our daughter’s teenage years were rough! I remember telling her once, “You are going down this road of destruction over my dead body!” She almost did!

But God chose me to be her mom, so I was determined to be the best mom I could be. The good news is that God wants the same thing. Being a parent is a holy calling from God, and God never calls us to do a job without providing the power and the plan

Way Too Busy

by Mary Southerland | | 9 comments

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It seems we always have a helicopter landing in our house! Have you ever been nearby when a helicopter lands? Everything is in total chaos. The air from the rotors knocks everything in its path off its feet – mainly you. Everything around you is loud and unsettled. It is a rush – and a panic attack all rolled up into one. I’m not a fan. And yet I bring this situation on myself.

My husband says that being married to me is a lot like living on a helicopter-landing pad. I am always on the move and always have a plan. I have to admit that I tend to equate busyness with productivity – a statement that is

Heaven on My Mind

by Mary Southerland | | 5 comments

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Heaven … heaven is on my mind these days. My sweet father-in-law graduated to heaven a few weeks ago where I am sure He was met by Jesus, his precious wife, and so many friends and loved ones who have gone before him.

Dad’s death vividly reminded me that this world is not my home. Heaven is. When I came to Christ in a personal relationship, my citizenship was changed from Earth to Heaven. And what a sweet exchange it was for me!

Heaven is where Jesus is.

Isaiah 63:15 “LORD, look down from the heavens and see; look at us from your wonderful and holy home in heaven.”

Heaven is a real place, a beautiful city of light.

Revelation 21:23 “The city

The Freedom of Forgiveness Part 1

by Mary Southerland | | 10 comments

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Do you remember the last words of Jesus as He hung on the cross? “It is finished!” The most literal translation would be “paid in full.”

I will never forget paying off my very first car loan. After sending in my forty-eighth and final payment, I celebrated the fact that I finally owned my bright blue and ever-so-compact Chevrolet Vega – from bumper to bumper. There were those who said you couldn’t drive a Vega – you had to wear it. Others described the bright blue color as strangely “unique.” But to me, it was the most beautiful car in the world because it was mine.

Of course I quickly found other places to spend the once allocated car payment

The Freedom of Forgiveness Part 2

by Mary Southerland | | 9 comments

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Part of forgiveness is releasing the person from the debt we think they owe us. Sometimes the best thing to do is simply let something go and cut our losses instead of allowing the weight of an unpaid debt deplete our mental and emotional energy. In other words, we can forgive the debt and free ourselves – a lesson I am continually learning to apply in my life.

Dan and I decided it was time to sell one of our old junky cars. A man who worked for the church where Dan pastored agreed to buy it. He and Dan worked out the terms – none of which the man kept. When Dan said he had decided to forgive

The Gift That Keeps On Giving

by Mary Southerland | | 1 comment

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Guilt is the gift that keeps on giving … unless we stop it in its tracks with the unconditional love and overwhelming forgiveness of God.

Sin requires only one payment … and that payment has already been made when Jesus gave His life for us on the cross.

Dan and I once had the opportunity to lead a weeklong youth revival for a large Korean church in Washington, D.C. At the end of the week, a lady from the church invited us to have dinner with her and the leadership of the church. We went to a wonderful but very expensive restaurant – the kind of restaurant that has no prices on the menu. When our hostess ordered one of

At the Corner of Stalling and Sin

by Mary Southerland | | 11 comments

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Procrastination is one of the greatest sources of stress in life. I once heard a preacher tell the old story of three demons who were arguing over the best way to destroy the Christian movement. The first demon had it all figured out. “Let’s tell all the Christians that there is no heaven. If we take away the reward incentive, their movement will collapse,” he said. The second demon responded with, “No, I have a better idea. Let’s tell all the Christians that there really is no hell. If we take away their fear of punishment, their movement will collapse.” The third demon offered, “Both of those are great ideas, but there is a better way. Let’s tell

The Power of the Tongue

by Mary Southerland | | 5 comments

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Our son and daughter-in-law and their four children recently moved to Kansas City and are living with us until they find a house. The conversation around the dinner table each night is always quite animated as Lelia and Jaydan, the nine-year-old twins, give a play-by-play account of their day at school.

During the middle of dinner last night, a rare moment of silence occurred. It did not last long. Lelia looked at me and said, “Mimi, do you know what the strongest muscle in the human body is?” I stopped to think about the question before offering several answers that Lelia quickly dismissed as wrong. “I give up!” I said. With her blue eyes twinkling and a big grin

Help! I’m Stuck

by Mary Southerland | | 5 comments

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I was enjoying a few moments of silence when I heard our two-year-old granddaughter bouncing down the hallway. Nori is a beautiful little girl with bright blue eyes and dimples that could charm the warts right off a frog. She jabbers constantly in a language that seems to be easily understood by other two-year-olds. Adults? Not so much. But I am learning.

I could tell by the tone of her voice that whatever Nori was talking about was a problem, and she did not like it one bit! She rounded the corner pushing her baby doll stroller and intensely fussing, “Tuck! Beebee tuck!” It took me a minute to assess the crisis. “Mimi! Beebee tuck!” she kept insisting. And

We Need Each Other

by Mary Southerland | | 2 comments

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A certain expert guide lived in the deserts of Arabia. He was known for his tracking skills and the fact that he never lost his way. The secret of his success could be found in the fact that he carried with him a homing pigeon that had a very fine cord attached to one of its legs. When he had doubts as to which path to take, he threw the bird into the air. The pigeon quickly strained at the cord to fly in the direction of home, leading the guide accurately to his goal. Because of this unique practice, the man was known as “The Dove Man.”

We always need connections to those who will point us in

A Heart That Listens

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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I was in a hurry. It was Wednesday, and I had several errands to run before heading to the church where I teach a monthly Bible study for women. My last stop was the grocery store. I wanted to pick up snacks and drinks for many of the women who came straight from work to the study. It didn’t take long to fill my cart with drinks, chips, fruit and a few bags of the oh-so-necessary chocolate treats. Mission accomplished, I headed to the checkout lane.

I suddenly had the thought that I should check out the Christmas decorations. Huh? Where had that thought come from? True, it was only a few weeks until Christmas, but I didn’t even

The Art of Confrontation

by Mary Southerland | | 3 comments

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Dan and I just celebrated 42 years of marriage. And every single day has been filled with peace, marital bliss, more peace … and I need to stop right there before a bolt of lightning strikes me dead!

Dan and I have a great marriage – most of the time. Honestly, there have been days when I have thought about getting in the car and driving away. I am sure there have been more days when Dan has had the same thought. We have weathered some severe storms in our marriage, and it is only by the grace of God that we still love and respect each other after all these years. We are best friends – flawed and

I Need Help!

by Mary Southerland | | 3 comments

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Hudson is only three years old, but he is already beginning to grasp the concept of accountability. Somewhere in his little heart, Hudson understands the truth that he needs someone to help him do the right thing. He knows he is weak. He wants to make the right choice, but sometimes he just can’t. And in those moments of weakness, he needs someone to take the decision out of his hands. Hudson has chosen his six-year-old brother Justus to be that someone in his life.

Justus and Hudson love the television show Paw Patrol which is a preschool action series about seven heroic puppies, Chase, Marshall, Rocky, Zuma, Rubble, Skye, and Everest, led by a tech-savvy boy named Ryder.

Jesus Knows You

by Mary Southerland | | 5 comments

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Have you ever wondered if God even knows your name? Have you doubted His awareness or even His concern about what you are going through? Have there been times when you felt totally alone and worthless? I have. I can relate to the woman described in Luke 13. Oh, our problems may not be exactly the same, but the feelings and emotions are – and so is the answer.

Jesus knew this woman. He knew she had been sick for 18 long years and that she had tried everything to be healed. He knew – but He looked past her pain and saw who she really was, and all she was created to be. He could have called her

Patience – Trust Waiting

by Mary Southerland | | 8 comments

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All relationships require patience. But the more difficult the relationship, the more patience is needed. As a result, we often find ourselves seated in one of God’s waiting rooms, waiting for that exasperating person to become encouraging, hoping that the difficult relationship with which we struggle will become easier. I hate to wait, for anything or anyone, which is the very reason I am in the waiting room to start with and the purpose behind the presence of sandpaper people in my life. They teach us to wait.

It is in those waiting rooms that the condition of the heart is exposed. Who and what we really are emerge from the unique pressure only a difficult relationship can bring.

When

Pruning – Part of God’s Plan

by Mary Southerland | | 1 comment

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I try to avoid pain whenever possible.

Pruning sounds painful to me … cutting and tearing away and leaving behind. But I have come to realize that pruning is an important part of the growth process.

Lincoln Love was a member of the first church where my husband was the lead teaching pastor. Before he retired, Lincoln worked for the Department of Defense … or they worked for him … I’m not really sure which was the true chain of command.

Lincoln was short … but only in height. He was a brilliant man with a big heart. Sparkling blue eyes gave away the boyish charm and energizing perspective with which he lived life.

Lincoln and his wife Marion adopted Dan and

Green with Envy

by Mary Southerland | | 2 comments

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We all know what it is like to be green with envy. We all struggle with jealousy at some point in life. Let’s be honest. How often do we look at another person and covet their success? How many of us are not content to serve God with the gifts He has given us while whining about the fact that others have the gifts we want. We convince ourselves that our longing for a bigger platform is to further the Kingdom when, in reality, that longing is for self-promotion, fame and recognition. Ugly, isn’t it? Jealousy is one of the most dangerous emotions because it is one of the most destructive.

“Anger is cruel, and wrath is like a

An Integrated Life

by Mary Southerland | | 5 comments

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Flying home from a speaking event, I was thumbing through a magazine someone left behind when the title of an article caught my eye. “Image is everything” the author declared. For a few seconds, I found myself mentally agreeing with the author’s statement until I recognized the subtle lie hidden in the seemingly-benign words.

As followers of Christ, we sometimes focus on developing and presenting the right image while neglecting the spiritual discipline of integrity. Our public lives are only as authentic as our private lives. Image is who and what people think we are while integrity is who and what we really are. Billy Graham once said, “Integrity is the glue that holds our way of life together.

I’m Tired

by Mary Southerland | | 8 comments

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I’m tired.

Tired of waking up each morning to face more trials – more noise – more chaos.

I’m tired of trying to “fix” people and circumstances.

I’m tired of dealing with angry people everywhere I turn.

I’m tired of senseless violence and the horrendous loss of life at the hands of broken people.

I’m tired of the incessant dealing with physical pain and constantly battling the darkness of depression.

I’m tired of Satan attacking my husband, my children, and my grandchildren!

What I want to do is quit. I want to give up. I want to take my computer and my cell phone and toss them in a garbage dump, cutting off my connections to so many people in the world I have carefully

Making My List and Checking It Twice

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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Every year, I make a Christmas list comprised of every person for whom I am buying a gift. Beside each name, I write a dollar amount – a limit for how much money I will spend on that gift – and whole-heartedly declare not to spend one penny more.

Somehow, the amount I actually spend rarely coincides with the amount I intended to spend, but I digress.

With every purchase, I then draw a beautiful red line through that name.

Done!

I carry that list everywhere I go because there are evil people lurking in my home who will go to any lengths to find that list. Why? Because I am the Queen of Christmas Surprise! I have to guard the Secret

Answered Prayer in A Shoebox

by Mary Southerland | | 5 comments

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My sister loves socks. One day, we were shopping and happened to walk into a department store where neither one of us could afford to buy a single thing. We were just passing through, on our way to find the bargains we could afford. With a sigh and a wistful look on her face, Betty said, “I wish I could afford to shop in this store.” When I asked her what she would buy, she immediately replied with a smile, “Socks! I want a big box of socks. I would wear a different pair every day.” I could think of several things I would have liked to buy in that store and socks was not one of them.

Wanted, Loved, and Chosen

by Mary Southerland | | 6 comments

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“You will never be able to have biological children,” the doctor said. After years of painful tests, expensive treatments, frustrating procedures and desperate pleas and prayers, our hopes of having children were shattered by his harsh diagnosis. “Then we will adopt,” my husband immediately replied. I wasn’t so sure. Could I love another woman’s baby as much as a child I would give birth to? I just didn’t know.

Months later, God called Dan to be the Youth Pastor of a church where we met a Christian attorney. “We’d like to talk with you about adoption,” Dan told the attorney. His response wasn’t encouraging. “I rarely do adoptions but come by my office and fill out the papers –

Choose to Live an Abundant Life

by Mary Southerland | | 5 comments

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I have discovered some wonderful advantages of growing older. Honestly, I can get away with so much more than I could when I was younger – and I love it!

Like many of you, I have paid some heavy life dues. I am enjoying a refreshing freedom in what I say and do – as long as I say and do it in love and with integrity before God.

I am flat-out amazed by the fact that people value my advice. They actually think I know what I am doing. Hilarious! I know!

But I am thrilled to share some of the God-truths I have learned along the way. I’m also

When God’s Love Shows Up

by Mary Southerland | | 7 comments

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The doorbell rang, but I had absolutely no desire to answer it. I was desperately trying to withdraw from my world. It was too dark and too painful. I just wanted to be left alone.

Clinical depression was sucking the life out of me. I was seeing a counselor. I was also under the care of a psychiatrist who discovered I had a chemical imbalance that required medication. But it would be a long, hard road.

The doorbell rang again. I pulled the covers over my head, determined to outlast whoever was trying to work their way into my pain. It was easier to just surrender to the darkness than it was to struggle my way to the light.

The doorbell

The Power of Praying Continually

by Mary Southerland | | 3 comments

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Three ministers were talking about prayer and the most effective positions for prayer. As they were talking, a telephone repairman worked silently in the background.

One minister shared that he felt the key to powerful prayer was all in the hands. “I always hold my hands together and point them upward as a sign of worship,” he explained.

The second minister suggested that real prayer should always be conducted on the knees.

The third minister shook his head and said, “I’m afraid you both have it wrong. The only position worth its salt is to pray while stretched out flat on your face.”

As the three ministers solemnly contemplated the wisdom they had shared, the phone man put down his tools, approached

Thankful for the Fleas

by Mary Southerland | | 6 comments

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While in Ravensbrück, Corrie ten Boom and her sister Betsy dealt with appalling conditions. The women’s labor camp dorms were crammed into three high trough-like sleeping barracks with rancid hay as their bed.

The cramped conditions and lack of basic sanitation led to lice and a massive infestation of fleas. Corrie wondered how they could endure such a dreadful place.

Betsy prayed and told her sister they must “give thanks in all circumstances.”

Corrie wondered how she could ever be thankful for the lice and the fleas.

Several weeks later, one of the supervisors was called into their barracks to view something Betsy was working on. The supervisor refused because the place was crawling with fleas.

Betsy then reminded her sister that it

Sitting At His Feet

by Mary Southerland | | 6 comments

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Every moment of every day is focused on someone or something. We either set the focus through which we live, or we allow it to be set for us. A balanced life is focused on God as a result of sitting at His feet.

What does it mean to “sit at the feet of Jesus”? 

First, we must stop. The lives of Mary and Martha are great examples of this truth. Mary stopped helping Martha in the kitchen to sit at the feet of Jesus. 

Martha complained that she had been left to do all of the work while her sister was wasting time. There will always be someone who misunderstands or complains when you choose to do what Jesus told

Get Your Praise On!

by Mary Southerland | | 10 comments

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When we lived in South Florida, the grass in our yard grew year-round. So did the weeds. We soon learned that the best way to deal with weeds was simply to take really good care of the grass. When the grass was healthy, it was thick and lush – leaving little room for weeds to grow.

When our hearts and lives are filled with praise, worry is a weed that will die from a lack of attention. When we choose to continually give God thanks, there will be little room in our hearts for fear.

Why?

Because praise acknowledges the very character of God, while thanksgiving recognizes the work of His hand. Together, praise and thanksgiving are powerful weapons against worry

From a Storm to a Whisper

by Mary Southerland | | 18 comments

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Movies with happy endings are my favorite movies. My family constantly teases me about my surreal perspective of movie entertainment, but honestly, life holds enough reality. Why would I want to pay good money to see even more reality made bigger and more frightening on a gigantic movie screen?

When the movie, “The Perfect Storm,” was first released, the previews suggested it had a happy ending. I should have known better, but we love the water and really, how bad could it be?

We bought tickets, popcorn, and drinks, found the best seats in the theater, and prepared to be entertained. Wrong! Just about every scene showed tiny boats caught in the grip of frightening waves and fierce winds. I

The Antidote to Worry

by Mary Southerland | | 10 comments

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Stress management is a spiritual discipline that begins with diligent preparation in every area of life – mental, emotional, physical, and spiritual. We must be ready to deal with stress before we are required to deal with stress. 

Dealing with stress is an ongoing daily battle that will not end on this side of Heaven. To win that battle, we must be prepared. While there is no single secret to handling stress, God’s Word is filled with many truths that can enable and empower us to deal with stress in a healthy, productive, and God-honoring way.  

Sometimes the most familiar passages of scripture are also the most overlooked. Psalm 23 is one of those passages. I often find myself rushing to this psalm for peace and

Ready to Give Up?

by Mary Southerland | | 4 comments

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From the moment of birth, we are taught that successful people never give up. Yet, I have discovered the paradoxical secret that true success can only be found in complete surrender. 

Dr. Billy Graham tells the story of a little child who was playing with a very valuable vase. The child put his hand into the vase but could not pull it out. His father tried to free the little boy’s hand but couldn’t. They were thinking of breaking the vase when the father said, “Son, let’s try one more time. Open your hand and hold your fingers out really straight and then pull.” The look of alarm on the boy’s face surprised the dad until the little boy explained, “Oh

How Can I Go On?

by Mary Southerland | | 10 comments

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I love a great movie! To me, a movie is great when good wins over evil, the right guy gets the right girl, nobody gets hurt and everyone lives happily ever after. A bit naive, I know. But I have decided that there is enough harsh reality ripping through daily life without paying to see more on a movie screen.

With these criteria in mind, I went to see the movie “Seabiscuit.” There I was popcorn in hand, minding my own business and enjoying my brief respite, when his words slammed into my soul, yanking me back to the tenacious essence and interminable power of truth.

“You don’t throw a whole life away just because it’s banged up a little.”

I was done.

Although

Does God Need My Money?

by Mary Southerland | | 2 comments

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My husband is a surrendered giver. But I struggle with giving. I tend to blame my reluctance to give on the fact that I grew up in a shack on the edge of town. My mother often worked two and three jobs a day just to put food on the table.

My husband, on the other hand, grew up in a middle-class family, lived in a very nice house in a beautiful neighborhood, and never had to worry about having his needs met. You can see where my rationalizations took me. Yep – to a place of sin. 

God wants us to surrender everything we have to Him because the reality is that giving is the antidote to selfishness. I

Time for an Attitude Check

by Mary Southerland | | no comments

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My husband was a youth pastor for many years before becoming the senior pastor of a church. I learned many important life lessons during those years of working with youth. One of those lessons was accountability.

Several times a year, we would load our high school and college kids on a Greyhound bus and travel to a conference or mission field to help needy churches. Most of our trips required driving through the night to avoid the expense of staying in a hotel.

Long hours on a bus at night was the perfect setting for young romance to flourish. So Dan devised a plan that helped nip those blossoming romances in the bud. At any given moment, Dan would yell,

The Lesson of the Lost Boat

by Mary Southerland | | 6 comments

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The story is told of a young boy who carved a sailboat from a block of wood. When the boat was finished, the boy raced to a nearby stream, gently slid the boat into the water, and let it go. The boy watched his precious boat gather speed as it floated away. He didn’t realize there was an undercurrent in the stream until the boat was swept away beyond his reach. The little boy frantically searched until there was no light but couldn’t find his boat. With a heavy heart, the young boy headed home.

Several days later, the little boy was walking down the main street of his small town, when he saw a wooden boat in the

How Do You Harness Your Anger?

by Mary Southerland | | 7 comments

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I could not believe my eyes! I had decided to go grocery shopping – a chore I hate with all my heart. I drove around the parking lot, looking for a good parking spot – and there she was. A woman standing in the middle of a parking place waving cars away. Why? She was saving the spot for her husband who was circling the lot.

I had a choice to make. I could give in to my rising anger or I could harness that anger and drive away, praying that someone did not mow down that woman with their car.

And then, the story of Jesus confronting the money changers in the temple came to mind.

When Jesus saw money