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Today’s Truth

And now I will show you the most excellent way.

1 Corinthians 12:31

Friend to Friend

Today’s devotion is mainly for the thousands of wives who read GiG each day, but if you’re not married, you’re not off the hook. Take this opportunity to reflect on the way you pray in general. Now, here we go!

Most married women would agree that they long to be the women of their husband’s dreams. But I have a question. Why? Is it so that we can get what we want in the long run? Is it so that when he sees how irresistible we are he’ll magically become the man of our dreams meeting our every need?

Those are good questions – tough questions. But becoming the woman of his dreams won’t happen until we decide we would rather win his heart than win the battle, do right than be right, give more than get more, wrap our arms around him instead of wrap him around our little finger.

Becoming the woman of his dreams involves sacrifice. It involves respecting him as a man and a leader, adoring him as the one who makes your heart skip a beat, initiating intimate friendship through creating commonalities, safeguarding your marriage by putting him second only to God, encouraging him in his pursuits and dreams, and sexually fulfilling him. Many times this means denying ourselves and putting our man’s needs above our own.

Did you realize we can even pray for our husbands with wrong motives? James said, “When you ask you do not receive because you ask with wrong motives that you may spend what you get on your pleasures” (James 4:3). Ouch! Does that mean I can’t pray that Steve will change his mind about that new den sofa I want? Hmmm. The goal for praying for our husbands is not to get them to do what we want, but for them to do what God wants.

Hollywood tells us that we will be happy when we “find the right person.” However, I have discovered that a successful marriage occurs when we become the right person.

“For years I prayed that God would change my husband,” Denise told me. “Our marriage went from bad to worse and we ended separated and headed for divorce. Then I began to read about what it meant to be a godly wife. In the world’s eyes I was doing a pretty good job. In God’s eyes I was missing the mark. So I began to pray – this time for my own heart. God gave me the answer to my prayer to change my husband…He changed me.”

How do we begin to pray like the woman of our man’s dreams? A good place to start is by taking a look at the Bible’s definition of love found in 1 Corinthians 13. I love to use Scripture as a guide for prayer, so I’m going to pattern today’s prayer after this wonderful chapter on love. As a matter-of-fact, the verse that introduces this chapter says it well, “And now I will show you the most excellent way” (1 Corinthians 12:31b).

Let’s Pray

Dear Lord,

If I teach Bible study classes, volunteer for the church’s women’s ministry, and sing in the choir, but do not love my husband, I am only a resounding gong or a clanging cymbal. If I have a college degree, high paying job, and successful career, but do not love my husband, I am emotionally and spiritually bankrupt. If I have faith that can move mountains, am quick to pray for those in need, and even have half the Bible memorized, but do not love my husband, I am disobedient and do not please God. If I keep a spotless house, maintain a well-manicured lawn, and prepare nutritionally balanced meals, but do not love my husband, it is all for naught. Hired hands can do as much.

Lord, help me to be patient. Help me to be kind. I pray that I will not envy others who have seemingly happier marriages and husbands who are more helpful around the house or thoughtful or romantic. I pray that I will never try to lift myself up by putting my husband down. Lord, I pray that I will not be a proud woman who refuses to listen to her husband, who always has to have the last word, who always thinks her way is best. I pray that I will not be rude to my husband with curt comments, not disregard his needs, and not be ungrateful for all he does and is, but treat him with the respect and honor that the king of a castle deserves.

I pray that I will not be self-seeking, always thinking about what is best for me, but thinking of what would be best for my husband. I pray that I will not be angered easily, not hold a grudge, not keep a record of wrongs, not plan ways to retaliate, and not use my tongue as a weapon to cause pain. I pray that I will not rejoice and say “I told you so” when things don’t work out the way my husband hoped.

Lord, above all, I pray that my husband will see me as his chief cheerleader who desires to rejoice with him in his victories, both big and small, that he will see me as one who longs to protect our marriage and our love. Help me to create a warm and loving environment in which he feels safe, wanted, and revered. I pray that You will give me endurance when things get tough. Help the word divorce never enter my mind or cross my lips as an option. Lord, I know that love never fails and that You never fail. Fill me with your Holy Spirit to give me the endurance to stand up under trials and love my husband as You would have me love him – till death do us part.

In Jesus’ Name,

Amen.

Now It’s Your Turn

Today’s application step is very simple. Open your Bible to 1 Corinthians 13 and pray those words over yourself as well as your husband.

If you are single, open your Bible to 1 Corinthians 13 and pray those words over the significant people in your life.

More from the Girlfriends

Do you want to become the woman of your husband’s dreams? Would you like a little “wow” back in your relationship with the man you married? Then let seven simple secrets from my book, Becoming the Woman of His Dreams, transform your marriage. With Biblical wisdom and responses from hundreds of men I surveyed, you’ll get a glimpse into your husband’s deepest longings and have the marriage you’ve always longed for.

15 Responses to “The Best Wife Ever”

  1. Tanisia Murrell says:

    Thank you Sharon for this devotional and that powerful prayer! As a single woman in the wait, I truly desire to be found as a wife after God’s heart. I’ve copy copied the prayer in my journal and titled it “Prepare Me For The Promise!” Oh, how I desire to be fully obedient to God in every way! This truly encouraged my heart especially as Valentine’s Day weekend approaches and my heart has a tendency to become weary and sad. May our great God bless you abundantly for your obedience to His call! ?

  2. Lisa says:

    This one is a keeper! I need reminded how to treat my husband and our marriage. When times are tough, as sometimes they can be, I will turn to this. Thank you!

  3. Olga Soto says:

    What a blessing today’s devotional.
    God bless you all for what you bring daily into our lives, the Word of God.

  4. Mary says:

    Thank you for this devotional. It rekindles a desire within me to be the woman of my husband’s dreams. This prayer is a keeper, so encouraging and motivating. Thank you for this message. God bless you.

  5. Joy says:

    I have been struggling for years in my marriage. It is so hard to be the wife God wants me to be when the other person has a very angry and hard heart. Always there are obstacles and it seems to never end. I have dreamed of a marriage where Christ is the centre but that is not to be. Thanks for sharing today needed this.

  6. Cindy Doyle says:

    Let’s just say that I couldn’t have needed this more!!! Thank you for sharing this devotion because it’s an answered prayer! I will be praying this prayer every single day and saving this devotion to read over as well. I just started getting the GIG devotions sent to my email about 2 weeks ago and every one has hit me straight in the heart!

  7. Vickie says:

    MY marriage has been going through the deepest valley that it has ever experienced with the talk of divorce. But God has intervened this week to break down many walls. My husband who has been out of church for 15 years is now back in church and more in love with me than he has ever been. Just pray that I can remove walls that I put up to keep from getting hurt any more and that I can fall in love with him all over again.

  8. Vickie says:

    Thank you so much for ALL your wonderful devotions. they inspire and uplift me daily. I look forward to GIG daily.

  9. Joanna says:

    God used your words to speak to me this morning. I got into a heated fight with my husband yesterday and i reached out to God for direction…and He spoke to me though you. Thanks for this…

  10. Dawn says:

    I read and understood all that you said but my question is what do you do when the “king of the castle” is not playing his role. Meaning, not contributing much, financially, not being a partner, not helping around the house. I think I have been the kind of wife that God speaks of but how do I get my husband to be the kind of husband the bible says he should be?

  11. Charlotte says:

    Thank you for this wonderful devotion today. I, too, needed a reminder that when I so easily point out my husband’s faults, I should be reflecting on how I can be a better wife. God has given us the direction and guidance. We just need to constantly pray,read the Bible and devotions like this one to be reminded of how we should love our husbands. God bless you GIG.

  12. Constance says:

    Thank you.

  13. Lilian says:

    Thank you so much for this wonderful prayer that serves as an eye opener to every woman who has been longing for a better marriage relationship. More grace sis.

  14. Elizabeth says:

    Thank you so much for this wonderful prayer. It is definitely an eye opener, to see how I have been doing things so wrong. My husband left on Feb 8th for a few reasons and one of them was because he said I did not even like him. How unloved he feels. I didn’t realize until it was to late, but I have started reading your book Praying for Your Husband from Head to Toe and I am on the 2nd day of prayer. I’m standing on the word of God and have hope that it is not to late. I have longed for a better marriage for 10 years, now it is time to do my part!

  15. Lucy says:

    One of my favorite verses is from Proverbs 15:13. “A happy heart makes the face cheerful, but heartache crushes the spirit.

    I used to think that I was being a good wife, too. Actually it wasn’t until I read the verse above. My husband and I still have children at home, one has Special Needs. I finally had to let go and acknowledge and not take the little things for granted. He did, too. We both came to an agreement to just accept each other for who we are. You cannot change anyone. But you can change your reactions. This created more of a Happy Home for us.

    God Bless you ladies. I hope we can be encouragers to one another.

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