Today’s Truth

Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife.

Proverbs 21:9

Friend to Friend

If you were to observe my home, you won’t catch me doing linens on Mondays, mopping on Wednesdays, and doing my once-a-month cooking on the first Friday. One fine day, I was actually dusting the blinds. My husband James yelled, “What’s that noise?” alarmed the kids might be messing with something.

“It’s me, cleaning the blinds!” I shot back proudly.

He was quiet for a moment and then yelled in amazement, “I haven’t heard that sound in 10 years!”

Each home will have its own level of neatness to aspire to, but there is something that everyone can agree upon as ideal: living in a calm, peaceful home. What is the atmosphere of your home on most days? Could you describe it as a place of refuge or is it more chaotic or stressful? There’s the visible calm of a clean, orderly home and there’s also the invisible calm of a welcoming, loving environment.

What if you’ve had a lousy day, or week, or month? I know I’ve had bad mornings and still managed to smile at a room full of strangers in a meeting. Somehow we can put negative feelings behind us and act civilly – even warmly – to acquaintances and co-workers. Yet our families and closest friends can get the emotional scraps of the day.

The Bible says it exactly this way twice, “Better to live on a corner of the roof than share a house with a quarrelsome wife” (Proverbs 21:9, 25:24). The writer of this proverb would rather live in a awful spot unsuitable for cold or rain than in a comfortable house with a sour, scolding woman. No external conveniences can replace the desire and need for internal peace.

Do you realize the power you have to create a calm environment? Women are often like thermostats, setting the emotional tone for everyone else by acting warmly or coldly. You can invite the Holy Spirit into your life today so you can be joyful even when circumstances aren’t. You can show love towards your family by speaking a love language such as words of affirmation, gifts, time, acts of service, or physical touch even if you don’t feel like it. If your spouse likes things tidy, you can pick a few things up right before he comes home.

The outside world can be a noisy, harsh, ungodly place. Your home can be a needed refuge for the soul. A refuge is a place of resort and safety, a dwelling place, high tower, shelter, and hope. Purpose in your heart that when you’re home, you will do everything in your power to create a peaceful place. That may mean turning off the TV and computer more often, nagging less, looking for areas to praise instead of criticize, and possibly dusting the blinds from time to time.

Let’s Pray

Dear Lord, forgive me for being quarrelsome and ungrateful sometimes. Help me to be an agent of love in my home. Your Word says blessed are the peacemakers. I want to be a peacemaker in my home. Change my heart that I might be calmer and more respectful to those closest to me.

In Jesus’ Name,


Now It’s Your Turn

How would you rate the level of calm in your home on a scale from 1 to 10? Ask the Lord, “What’s one thing I can do to create a calmer home today?”

More from the Girlfriends

You can read more about creating domestic tranquility for your spouse in Arlene’s book 31 Days to a Happy Husband. Learn how to dream again together and take a quiz to assess if you have a happy husband.

9 Responses to “Creating a Calm Home”

  1. Emily Anne Buck says:

    Thank you for this! With 2 little boys, sometimes it’s not calm at all 🙂 But I wanted to comment, because I’m reading your 31 Days to a Happy Mom book…and I adore it! In fact I want to send it to all my friends! Such a good and knowledgeable read! Thank you 🙂

  2. Olga says:

    Wow,I am lost in awe of the holy spirit. He is talking to me by this devotional. Lord I sincerely ask for your grace to always reflect peace in my home especially now that our finances is not what we have anticipated. I get so weighed down any time I look away from the cross.

    • Priscilla says:

      Hey Olga, you doin? just wanted to share with you this wisdom that was passed down from Girlfriends in God, We are so regal!!!!!!! AT ANY AGE

      Yes. I am a daughter of the Most High, King of kings. A noble princess in God’s kingdom with an endless and enchanting inheritance. I am not, however, entitled to grumble and complain about pithy and petty little annoyances. Not even about big things!

  3. Cindy says:

    Thank you for sharing! So grateful we have a peaceful home, God is so great!

  4. Please add: when not in YOUR power, pray the Lord grants the power to be at peace & impart peace.

  5. Sue says:

    My goal for our home is not only that it would be calm and peaceful, but that it would be warm, welcoming, a place of refuge from the storms.

    My prayer is that all who call it home would look forward to returning there at the end of the work day with happy anticipation, knowing that they will be met with unconditional love, acceptance, and there find rest for their souls and encouragement for facing the trials of daily life.

    It started out as a longing and prayer for my darling husband, but over the years we have found ourselves with a ministry of hospitality, providing a home for others, always people in times of change, transition, even turmoil.

    It takes a little planning and effort to do the hands on work of this ministry well, as both of us also work full time outside the home.

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